A Jaunt Outside
by Sylvator
Summary: Sirius is working himself into a brooding paranoia. Grimmauld Place is an echo of Azkaban and there is no progress in the warfront to uplift his spirits. Remus is honestly thinking if he doesn't get a breath of fresh air soon, he might just lose his old friend to his own demons. A jaunt outside, a simple mission gone awry and a slice of adventure can do wonders it seems. -Ootp


**A Jaunt outside.**

**Chapter 1: Contemplation**

For once, the door of Grimmauld place wasn't locked.

Sighing in apprehensive relief, Remus Lupin stepped inside the great house and closed the door softly behind him. The house was ominously empty, like he had left it and his feather light footsteps were the only sound in the great hall, sending tiny tornados of dust swirling around his feet. He rubbed his jaw wearily and headed straight for the kitchen; grasping the bag of edibles that Molly had thrust at him when he had been leaving the Burrow.

"_I packed up some cottage pie for Sirius, he likes those- oh - and there's extra dinner. I wouldn't want you dead on your feet, Remus dear. You need to get something in that skinny profile, especially for tomorrow night."_

Remus smiled softly at her fussing; the woman had a tendency to be quite irritable sometimes, but her caring nature always left a mark. He resumed his journey down the steps, sighing in exhaustion: the full moon was tomorrow night, and the wolf within him seemed more arduous than usual, scraping at his wolfsbane- induced brain and really giving him quite a headache. The fuller the moon became, the more he was able to sense the wolf's presence and he didn't like it at all; it did a fair job of reminding him about his condition and the dawning full moon.

He pushed the door open softly. It didn't creak: Molly had seen to it that it had been polished and oiled as to not be a bother during Order meetings. Remus stepped inside the dimly lit kitchen and stopped in his tracks upon spotting his oldest friend hunched over the table. Sirius was sitting with his elbows on the table, his head resting in his hands and hiding his face from view. He hadn't bothered combing his hair again and it fell in dark tangles down his back. He didn't look up when Remus came in and deposited the bag onto the counter.

Remus sighed inaudibly as he took in his friend's appearance before putting on the kettle for making tea. He didn't say anything in greeting or otherwise during the time that the tea was made and Sirius ignored him in return, barely acknowledging his presence.

Pouring the tea automatically in two mugs, he set one in front of Sirius with a soft thud and squeezed his shoulder gently before he settled in the seat opposite his friend, sipping soundlessly from his own mug and relaxing as the warm liquid soothed his tired bones.

He leaned back in his chair, pushing his bronze hair out of his eyes and once again, mentally vowing to cut it the moment he got the chance; it had grown longer than it had ever been before, falling in thick cascades to his shoulders. According to Nymphadora Tonks, it made him look ravishing, and though fond he was of Nymphadora, he wasn't quite sure he could trust her fashion sense, which mostly included spikes and highlighters in the most bizarre colors.

He ran his eyes over Sirius's dark tangles that had grown down to his waist, maybe even further, if Remus paid close attention. He idly wondered why Sirius kept growing it when he didn't even bother to care. But then again, a man hardly cared about such things when he was depressed and downing wine like it was his lifeline. Speaking of which, Remus narrowed his eyes when he spotted a bottle of Firewhiskey dangling from his friend's loose fingers, half hidden behind his arms.

He sighed and leaned back again and sipped his tea, eyeing Sirius thoughtfully over his cup. In all honesty, he couldn't remember the last time he had seen his friend looking so helpless; his hunched and pitiable posture was one that he had only taken once back in sixth year, after James had stopped yelling at him for almost getting Snape killed. But even then, he hadn't been so far gone, scarred forever from Azkaban.

Remus bit his lip and frowned unsurely at Sirius and wondered for the hundredth time how he was still keeping up with everything that had happened to him so far. Sirius Black had never been a patient soul: impulsive and reckless and wild-tempered, he had never felt the need for waiting for anything. But now, after twelve years of being tortured in the foulest place on earth and being locked up in a house he loathed, it really was a wonder how he had managed to pull through. Even Remus, who prided himself for having a threshold of pain higher than many, had trouble imagining himself sane if he were in Sirius's shoes.

He looked away from his friend to the fire and tried to imagine it, being trapped in the lair of dementors for a decade. What had Sirius occupied himself with in there? Nothing but agonizing memories, thoughts of betrayals and past mistakes? His brother's death, James and Lily's murder, thoughts of his forsaken family, worry about Harry and anger on Peter's betrayal? There was probably more, but Remus didn't dare ask.

He had talked to Sirius about Azkaban before, but on such occasions, it was Sirius who broached the subject, not Remus. Remus felt almost afraid asking him anything about the wizard prison, in fear that he might rekindle more depressing thoughts for him.

He looked back at his friend's profile and felt his heart squeeze; Sirius's burdens outran his own by a long shot. Being bitten by a werewolf at the age of six was a tragic burden alright, but being thrown into the bowels of Azkaban for twelve tormenting years and being stripped of beauty and hopeful future was just too much, especially when all you had done was stand for the right thing.

Remus sighed yet again and finished his tea, not failing to notice that Sirius hadn't looked up even once, let alone touched the mug in front of him. Remus didn't say anything still; he wasn't sure what he would find in Sirius's eyes when he looked up, and wasn't sure he wanted to know either. Every time he would look at Sirius, he would get a painful jolt in his chest to see the haunted face in the place of the warm and handsome one that had once been the undoing of many a Hogwarts girl.

It depressed him too, looking at Sirius like that. It wasn't that he had tried cheering him up, but simply the fact that hardly anything cheered him up anymore. He should know, for Sirius's forced smiles had stopped appearing altogether even from the quirks of one, Nymphadora Tonks. He was re-living his days in Azkaban in the dementor-free House of Black, regretting past memories and worrying himself crazy over Harry.

Remus had even tried distracting him from his burden, but it seemed that Sirius didn't want a distraction; he was getting used to his helpless situation, getting more helpless by the day, and that thought terrified Remus more than anything. Sirius had never been one to give up, the biggest proof of that being his clinging to hope in Azkaban and breaking free without losing his mind. But enough was enough and this whole thing had to have a limit. The small distractions that Remus and the rest of the Order had to offer were wearing off and losing their effect and Sirius was drowning deeper into his own sorrows. He wasn't going crazy yet, but Remus knew he would if he gave up, and lately that was starting to seem too likely.

Sirius didn't need a distraction. He needed the real thing: a breath of freedom, even for a short time. And the only way he would get that was to risk his freedom once again.

Remus winced softly at the complicity of it all and rubbed his temple. It was just too unbearable, watching his closest friend decaying away slowly into a void. He desperately wanted to help, in any way he could, just like Sirius had helped him all those years ago.

Of course, it had seemed impossible to Remus that anything could be done for his lycanthropy and the painful full moon nights he had spent trying to cope with it. But they had figured out a way, James and Sirius, and they had gone out of their way to make it work, risking expulsion, trials and even their own lives, only so that Remus could find solace in his dark world. They hadn't wavered and proved their loyalty to a pained werewolf who had long thought that he could not be accepted.

And what had he done for them in return? Watched helplessly as one got murdered and the other thrown into prison. Two wonderful lives, destroyed in front of his eyes.

He owed them too much. For this sole reason he had vowed to protect James's son and for this sole reason he spent such dull, depressing evenings in Grimmauld place, just being there if Sirius needed him.

But it wasn't _enough_. Not by a long shot. Not at all enough to repay them for all they had done for him, definitely.

But what could he _do_? It wasn't the first time he was thinking of it, but all thoughts failed him. The only way he could give Sirius any kind of hope was to sneak him outside for fresh air, away from the confines of his prison. But he wouldn't do that either, for he certainly had no desire to put Sirius in danger.

So it all came down that it was a hopeless situation and he had to watch his oldest friend slowly kill himself and worst, knowing that he couldn't do anything about it.

Or could he?

He sat up straight in his chair, eyes never wavering from Sirius' still form, and suddenly wondered what James would have done if he'd been in his, Remus's, place. He smiled at the mere thought of it: of course, James would have wasted no time in forming a wonderful plan for a night outside in a remote, Death Eater-free, Auror-free place where they could spend the night chasing after the stars without caring how far away they wound up. Knowing James, he would form such a plan every other week, spreading trouble everywhere he went without giving anyone the slightest of suspicions, as only James could. And throughout the course, he would see to it that Sirius got back safe and uncaught. After all, he'd done it before many times, appearing out of the blue at the right time to prevent a very _Sirius_ disaster.

Remus bit his lip, suddenly feeling a warm wave swirl in his chest as his mind set off to think up a plan, any reckless plan, that only his teenage-self had ever done.

**Chapter 2: The plan**

Impulsively, he leaned forward and gently grasped Sirius's hand in his own. It wasn't a very manly gesture, he knew, but at the moment he didn't care. He pried Sirius's hands gently away from his face, forcing him to look up. "Sirius?"

Sirius dropped his arms and lifted his head up; his haunted gaze seemed to penetrate the air with its sharpness.

"It's the full moon tomorrow."

A black eyebrow cocked, questioning.

"I have a mission in Halvah square, right off the floo from The Bibbity Rabbit's Burrow_, again_," Remus continued. "That place is a home for stray werewolves and I've had to go there for every night since the last full moon. Dumbledore expects a few Death Eaters and Greyback's gang of ferals to infiltrate at the right time, just before the full moon rises. According to him it's a perfect opportunity for getting more recruits, so I have to be there to report, since Wolfsbane lets me keep my mind…"

Sirius was looking suspicious now, frowning at him with narrowed eyes.

"…of course, they won't know but all in all, it's a stupid mission that could have some luck for the Order, that is, if Greyback _does_ show up-"

"Moony," Sirius cut him off. "What's the bloody catch?"

Remus swallowed invisibly, bracing himself. "Well, these missions are usually quite uneventful save the graces of the dingy werewolf pub and it's tasteless Firewhiskey and I've been getting really frustrated to the point of thinking that they hardly matter. And to be honest, I've been asking a bit of company for quite some time. But Moody's as paranoid as ever and breathing down Dumbledore's neck to 'keep an eye out for the spunky Lupin boy' apparently." He rolled his eyes good-naturedly at this. " Since I pretty much have to sit around and keep an eye out for any suspicious movement, I was wondering if- you know- " he hesitated, then continued hurriedly before his logical side could force him to change his mind, " if you might want to come with me, you know, like the old days…"

He trailed off vulnerably, still debating with himself inside. Sirius, however was staring at him as though he had just delivered his death sentence, which in a very twisted way, he probably had. Almost instantly, the clammy fingers Remus held wrapped around his hand with a pincer-like grip.

"Are you sane, Moony?" Sirius hissed. "Have you completely lost your mind?"

Remus glanced at him in surprise, having not expected such a negative attitude at all. Re-thinking, he was forced to remember that maybe he didn't understand Sirius all that well anymore. "You don't have to come if you don't want to, mate." He said defensively. "I've just been getting really bored with the whole business and I'm damn sure you're bored with this house as well, so the idea of a jaunt really does appeal…"

"Have you completely lost your mind?" Sirius repeated, louder this time, his voice echoing off the kitchen walls. Remus studied him, confused. "Sirius…?"

"Would you really do that for me?" Sirius's eyes were suddenly smoldering, the silver in them seeming to burn. The hollowness was still there but it seemed to be filling up with silver fire. Remus felt his chest constrict painfully and he tightened his hold on his friend's hand in turn.

"Anything for you, Padfoot."

And the look on Sirius's face could have paid off for a dozen lonely nights under the full moon. He didn't smile, but the tortured creases unwrinkled and the frown smoothed out where it had appeared to permanently remain on his face. The tightness of his lips gave way and his eyes looked like sweltering pools of silver, swirling in a hopeful trance.

Hope. There was hope on Sirius's face, finally, the one thing that Remus had longed to see. And suddenly, incredibly, he looked a decade younger and so _Sirius_ in that heartfelt moment.

He leaned back slowly and reached for his mug with his right hand, never breaking eye contact with Remus. He took a few mouthfuls of cold tea before putting the cup down unceremoniously. "Tomorrow night?" he asked, with a poor attempt at casualness.

Remus nodded, gently letting go of his hand to lean back in his chair. "Tomorrow, at around five, we leave. I'll try to grab Moody's invisibility cloak, because I have no doubt they're keeping an eye out for a black dog as well, thanks to both Malfoy and Peter, or maybe we'll just have to work on your appearance to give them a slip. Either way, we have to be out of here by five."

"Sounds good."

"And Padfoot, if you open your mouth one time too many and have Molly suspecting anything, I'll shut you up with Buckbeak for the entire night."

An amused twinkle appeared unexpectedly in Sirius's eyes. "Sounds good." He repeated simply.

Remus nodded. "Of course we'll have to make arrangements in case something unexpected happens and Dumbledore needs you to be here, not to mention, Order members popping up unexpectedly, although it's not very likely, but either way." he rubbed the back of his neck thoughtfully. "I trust you wouldn't have a problem with applying that trip-the-boogie hex we invented back in sixth year, when Isabelle Tracklow ended up asking Nearly Headless Nick out while thinking he was you. The poor ghost was really broken when she turned him out with a shriek."

Sirius let out a dry chuckle at that. "I did it to Fred when he was here for Christmas. Poor boy, I had him thinking Molly was me and she didn't stop yelling at him until he apologized for asking her how a human could specialize in the art of scent-marking without having to turn into dog…"

Remus grimaced, remembering an oblivious Fred whacking his mother playfully on the shoulder while asking her if she could teach him how to scent mark Malfoy's bed-post… he shook his head at his friend disapprovingly before continuing; "Fine, I guess I'll leave you to fool any poor unexpected visitors for tomorrow. And don't forget to feed Buckbeak and tell that blasted elf to keep his mouth shut about this… and, yes, just-just leave the rest to me."

He wondered if he had imagined the meaningful smirk on Sirius's face when he turned to leave.

**Chapter 3: the pub and the forest**

Remus was berating himself again and again at his foolishness, wondering how on earth he had been stupid enough to think that this plan would work. He wasn't a schoolboy anymore; he should accept that teenage quirks had to be left for teenage years and that a thirty-seven year-old man did not have what it took to formulating an excellent scheme that would survive all hindrances.

He glowered meaningfully at the great _white_ dog barking in excitement loud enough for the world to hear while he tried desperately to stifle a laugh.

He wasn't sure what he found so amusing about a white-coated Padfoot but it definitely had something to do with the scuffed-up snowy neck and the fluffy feather tail thrashing left and right. Indeed, he had laughed for a good five minutes when he had finished changing Padfoot's appearance, receiving a severe doggy glare throughout their journey to the Bibbity Rabbit's Burrow, but Sirius had finally decided that he had been indoors for too long and the scenery was much better to look at than Remus's face and had bounded off cheerfully to chase a few chickens across the street.

Remus sighed in defeat as he followed the large snowy dog toward the pub, shoving away any attempts of gesturing to Sirius to stop attracting so much attention. He nearly had to drag him away from the two squealing young girls who had stopped to pet him on the head.

He shot Fredrick, the barman, an apologetic look when he entered with Sirius, who was practically quivering with excitement.

"Sorry, Fred," he said when the middle-aged man strolled over to him. "I'll be taking him out in a minute. We just need the floo."

"Him?" Fredrick looked mildly surprised as he studied the great white dog. "Sure, it's big, but I would've thought it was a female."

Sirius's hackles rose and Remus hurriedly stifled another chuckle, before gesturing to Fredrick to lead the way. They made their way to the back of the pub and entered a small backroom. Fredrick walked up to the fireplace and waved his wand. Immediately, it burst with flame.

"Thanks Fred," Remus told him while grabbing some green powder from the jar he held out.

"All in a day's work." Fred nodded at him before turning to pat Sirius on the head. He sullenly accepted the kind gesture, and then bounded up to the fireplace when the flames turned emerald in color.

"Thanks again," Remus called to the barman one last time before grabbing Sirius by the scruff of his neck and stepping into the green fire. "Halvah Square!"

They stumbled out of a dingy fireplace in an equally dingy pub which, though enormous at first sight, seemed to be crowded with people. Men, women and children of all ages lounged on the faded armchairs near the back, some sat at the numerous tables, clutching wine bottles of some green liquid and some strolled in and out of the pub, chattering along noisily. Most of them wore ragged clothing and sinister expressions to match their wild hair and unruly appearance, which included some scars and bruise-like circle beneath the eyes.

"Werewolves." Remus whispered to Sirius who was hunched forward in alertness, piercing eyes taking in every corner of the old place. He sniffed distastefully at the air and let out a low growl. Remus glanced around once before brushing ash off his robes and leading him toward the door.

"Oi, spiff dog, Lupin!" a young man with wild dark hair and scars along his chin stalked over, his movements jerky and canine. He grinned at Remus and ruffled Sirius's head roughly. "Come to get some company on the tour, have you, fella?"

Remus smiled slightly. "He likes to help out once in a while."

"Well, might as well get him out of before he gets any dung on his fur." The young man patted Sirius's head again. "He's way too pretty to be here."

Sirius growled at him before bounding full speed toward the door, resulting surprised cries and profanities from whomever he jostled out of the way. Remus sighed, nodded at the young werewolf and started off after him, muttering apologies on the way.

They stepped out into the patched lawn of the square just as the first stripe of gold appeared in the sky, signaling the beginning of sunset. A warm breeze blew from the trees and ruffled Sirius's fur, making him let out a whine of contentment. Remus smiled at him and moved him forward, away from the commotion of the pub where werewolves were still chattering away without any care of who might hear.

They walked on for a good ten minutes, getting further away from the pub, until Remus stopped and pointed out a great patch of trees to Sirius. "The forest starts here." He told his dog-friend, who tilted his canine head to a side questioningly. "It's the best place for them to thrash into on the full moon. Since werewolves are the only species of wolves that don't travel in packs, they don't have much chance of encountering each other when they let loose. And considering there are around seventy of them here, no death eaters could ever dare to step in on the obvious. They'd rip them to pieces without a second thought." He grinned at Sirius. "This is why you can let loose too. This is probably the safest place in England if you concealed yourself long enough." He huffed then. "Of course, that is until the ferals decide to show up."

Sirius let out a soft growl before nudging Remus's arm with his side, staring straight ahead. Remus followed his gaze to a young girl stepping out from between the trees. She was short and thin with long brown hair that hung down her back in dark tangles. Remus smiled and waved a hand in her direction. "Hullo, Miria."

The girl glanced up, startled, and then visibly relaxed when she spotted him. "Hi, Remus." She increased her pace as she walked toward them, a distinctly feline spring to her step.

"Yes, she's a friend." Remus said in a low voice when Sirius turned wide questioning eyes to him. The girl, Miria, halted in front of him and smiled, pushing strands of dark brown hair away from her face. "I wasn't expecting you to come this month." She told him shyly.

"Me neither," he answered. "But I do prefer the forest than a barred room on the full moon."

"True," she smiled, turning her head. Her dark eyes widened when she spotted Sirius. "Wow!" she bent toward the giant creature eagerly, flexing her fingers adoringly at him. "I've never seen a dog so big before. Is he yours?"

"Not really," Remus admitted. "He belongs to a friend of mine. He doesn't mind me taking him out once in a while."

"He's beautiful!" Miria exclaimed, stroking his fur tenderly. "Are you sure he's a dog? He looks more like a wolf to me."

"He's probably a hybrid." Remus grinned at the glare Sirius shot him. "But he's a good boy, doesn't mind accompanying a poor old werewolf on a stray night out."

"He sure looks it-oh!" Miria giggled as Sirius nuzzled her shoulder. "He likes me!" she glanced up at Remus with innocent cheer. "What's his name?"

"Padfoot."Remus smiled at her before turning to look back at the direction of the pub. "Miria, would you mind keeping him company for a minute while I hurry back and grab a drink?"

"No problem, he's safe with me." She told him, still innocently engrossed at the great beast now nuzzling her hand.

Remus nodded and started back, calling over his shoulder; "Just don't attract too much attention. He can be a handful when he wants to show off."

**Chapter 4: ominous suspicion**

He wasn't sure if he was relieved or worried when he walked back from the pub half an hour later. There had been no sign of either Greyback or any other suspicious feral amongst the other werewolves. The full moon would be coming out in hardly a few hours and when that happened, entrance or escape through the forest would be impossible for the Death Eaters. The only logical conclusion he could make was that the Death Eaters had postponed their plan of recruiting the lycanthropes for another month.

He passed by a group of men sprawled on the dirty lawn, bottles of whiskey clutched loosely in their hands as they stared up at the stars with haunted, glazed eyes. Remus had seen those eyes before, eyes wide with fear and anticipation for yet another full moon. He had felt such an expression claim his face so many times, he couldn't count.

He reached out and helped a struggling one to sit up, who shot him a crazy, grateful grin that looked almost animalistic on his face. "Thanks mate."

Remus nodded and kept on toward the forest, smiling slightly. No matter how many times he had criticized this place, or been disgusted by its uncivilized loop, he admitted that it was one of the few places that had felt somewhat home to him. It was a place where he didn't have to hide what he was, where he was accepted and could accept others like him while they all struggled through their torn lives simply to see the end of it.

It was at times like these when he thought of Sirius, James, Lily, Harry, the Weasleys and the Order .He felt guilt-ridden as he watched his fellow lycanthropes as they dunked themselves in wine and sorrow, thinking just how much more lucky than them he was, having founded other people to accept him the way he wanted them to.

He reached the forest and stopped abruptly, glancing around in the silence. Panic suddenly gripped him when he saw that Miria and Sirius were nowhere to be seen. He started quickly into the trees, straining his sharp ears for any familiar bark. He hadn't meant to take that long, but then again he hadn't thought anything would happen to them so close to the square, unless of course they had wandered too far ahead.

He told himself he was being paranoid: the forest was safer than the square if nothing else. Only hours before the full moon, the heightened senses of the lycanthropes could easily make out anything suspicious for miles around. Any Death Eater wandering too close would be signing his death sentence. And Sirius was a strong man who knew how to look after himself, and even if he did do something stupid and reckless, Remus was sure that Miria, despite her introvert personality, knew how to sink her teeth in anything threatening.

He had hurried only a yard or two in the span of a few minutes when a low howl erupted some yards to his right. He started to turn when a sudden pang of pain slashed through his shoulder, all the way to his throat. Dazed, he looked back over his shoulder and froze.

A slight breeze ruffled the leaves overhead as Remus gazed with dread at the maple tree standing only feet away, wondering if he had imagined the yellow gleam of feral eyes staring back at him only a second ago. He stepped cautiously up to the tree, inhaling in the scent of the place.

The area was completely deserted save for him, and there was no sign of any movement behind or about the tree at all. Remus frowned at the tree, inhaling again and straining his ears. The air smelled of dirt, leaves and earth, along with the unmistakable scent of wolfish beings roaming just outside the forest. The only sounds his ears picked up were the whoosh of the breeze, the rustling of the leaves and, of course, the familiar bark of a large wolfish dog nearing him with astounding speed.

Having had too many painful experiences in the past, courtesy to Padfoot's enthusiasm, he had the mind to hurl out of the way as the great white form burst from the nearby brush, paws out, and missing him by mere inches. He landed on his side on the leaf-strewn ground and looked up as a hysterical giggle sounded from above him. Miria was looming over him, her laughing expression hiding her concern.

"A-are you okay?" she managed at length, grabbing his shoulder and helping him to sit up. "I-I am _so_ sorry… but it _was_ funny…"

Remus grunted in understanding as he glanced scornfully across the trail at the monstrous beast who was now winking one of its gleaming eyes at him. "It's alright, Miria. It was just the lout's idea of a good laugh."

Controlling herself, Miria pulled her brown locks away from her face and patted Sirius on the head appreciatively. "He's wonderful." She informed Remus. "The most intelligent of his kind I've ever seen, not that I've ever seen a dog so big, though…" she sighed, shaking her head, "Animals are such wonderful creatures. They don't really care if we're monsters or not."

Remus smiled gently at her while staring soulfully at Sirius before he stood up and deliberately gave the dog a slight shove in the side, earning a low growl in response, which he dually ignored. "Where were you?" he addressed the sullen girl.

"Not very far off from here." She said defensively as though he was accusing her. "Padfoot just came further on when he realized you were here."

"Right." Remus looked at both of them in turn. "Did you happen to sense anyone else here, around this area specifically?"

Miria tilted her head, frowning, while Sirius growled in denial. "No," she said thoughtfully. "I don't think they would enter the forest before the moon rises. They're still loitering around the pub."

Frowning, Remus nodded and glanced around once more. If Miria and Sirius, both of who had been really close by, hadn't sensed anything suspicious, then it was a high probability that he had simply imagined the yellow eyes glaring at him behind the maple tree. He straightened up and signaled them to follow him back to the square. Yes, that was it. He had imagined it because he had been too busy thinking about the ferals.

Consoling his jerky nerves was a whole another story, though, especially with the full moon only hours away. As he walked back behind the young lycanthropic girl and the big dog, he couldn't shake the nagging feeling that he was being watched by the same yellow eyes he had seen earlier.

**Chapter 5: The birds and the bees**

"She's a good kid," Sirius said appreciatively, twirling the bottle between his nimble fingers. "When did you meet her?"

"On the first mission I had in this place." Remus leaned back against the trunk of the tree, gazing at the starless night through his fringe. His bones felt like they weighed a ton and every muscle in his body were ominously numb. He sighed and relaxed against the rough bark before looking across his perch at Sirius, who was hunched forward on the branch, his eyes gleaming even in the darkness.

"Poor kid," he said softly. "Must be some life if she likes living here."

"Every one of them likes living here. It's a place where they're not hated and can accept life as it is."

"As if they have a choice." Sirius's voice was laced with bitterness. "Every damn person has to accept life the way it turns out for them. The only way of escaping is death." He ran a hand over his long hair. "Take me: I'm probably worse off than a werewolf the way my life's turned out. Watching James and Lily die, looking on as my idiot brother sold his life to Voldemort and of course, letting that wretched rat slip through my fingers and biding _his_ time in Azkaban…"

Remus stared at his friend with mild surprise. He hadn't been expecting him to bring up such a depressing subject when he actually had found a chance to escape from it. But somehow it didn't sound all that depressing while they sat in comfortable companionship on the tree branch, patiently waiting for the full moon to take over the sky.

"You're right," he intoned after a few seconds. "I'm better off as a withered old werewolf than to pull on your shoes." He blew out a weary sigh. "But it hasn't been easy for me either. I almost completely lost myself when James died, and the shock of Peter's supposed death didn't help matters any, not to mention, the thought of you as Voldemort's right hand man and responsible for the Potters' deaths… that really shook me, you know. And there was this horrible feeling that I was the only one left…"

Sirius let out a dry chuckle. "And so the not-so-amazing end to the amazing marauders, eh?"

"I wouldn't go that far," Remus informed him. "You and I are still alive. So is Peter for that matter, not that he counts anymore-"

"It's not the same." Sirius interrupted him, swatting the leaves above him with the empty bottle. "Prongs gone, the rat forever a rat, me stuck in that accursed house and you dawdling around drunken werewolves… damn, it's not the same."

"Of course it's not the same, but James is the only one who's dead. Let's pretend Peter never existed and that leaves only the two of us."

There was sullen silence for the next few minutes during which Sirius gazed with an unreadable expression at the sky and Remus watched him thoughtfully.

"I wonder where he went wrong." He finally said. "Wormtail, I mean." He instantly regretted saying it when he saw Sirius's shoulders tense. He knew his friend was particularly sensitive to the subject of Peter, even more so than James and Lily. And Remus knew, that despite what Sirius had said to Harry when they had found him in the Shrieking Shack two years ago, he had never completely agreed on the idea of letting the rat go alive, and personally, Remus didn't blame him in the least: Revenge for the Potters was one thing, but neither James nor lily had had to spend twelve years in the most terrifying place on Earth due to someone else's crime. Death was easier than pain, Remus knew that more than many and Sirius had seen too much of it. He had escaped Azkaban to avenge himself too, more so than James.

"I don't know." Sirius's voice startled him: he hadn't been expecting an answer. "I just don't know what happened to him. I know that he was a stupid idiot, but I never thought he would end up…the way he did."

"Me neither." Remus smiled ruefully. "To think one of us would actually side with Voldemort… and against James too."

"It wasn't just James." Sirius's voice was a low growl, much resembling the sound of the dog he had been earlier. "He got all of us, one by one. Just thinking about it makes my blood boil; the helpless little rat got us all." He seethed for a second before turning to Remus with frustration written on his features. "Why did he do it Moony? I just don't get it. All those years at Hogwarts, all that we shared… didn't that mean anything to him?"

Remus sighed. "It definitely did. But I'd like to think he thought he wanted more, or maybe he didn't think of us as the way we did of him." He managed a bitter smile at this. "You know, I always guessed he thought that he didn't fit in with us. Maybe he just wanted to prove something."

"Well, it wasn't worth it." Sirius glowered at the bottle in his hand. "And you know what gets to me? That I never thought that he was the spy, and that I was stupid enough to suspect-" he trailed off.

"Me." Remus finished for him. Sirius glanced at him with a guilty glint in his eyes. "Remus-"

"Don't apologize, you idiot." The werewolf muttered as he clamped a hand on his shoulder. "If anything, I should be the one apologizing for believing you were responsible for James's death for the past twelve years. I can't believe I did, but it seemed logical at the time, just like it seemed logical that I could be Voldemort's spy. Peter had us all fooled."

Another span of comfortable silence followed before Sirius broke it by smacking the branch with the poor bottle. "He was furious, you know. James; he yelled at me and Lily all the way when we told him to keep you out of the plan. He didn't want to hear the end of it."

Remus bit his lip as a heart-wrenching feeling took over him. "He would've done the same for Peter." He said quietly. "James never wanted to believe that any one of us could turn out wrong. He trusted us too much."

"I wouldn't blame him."

"Yes, but he died for it." He pushed the long hair away from his eyes as the breeze pushed it back over his face. "Though I wonder why you suspected me. Was it because I'm a-"

"If you finish that sentence, I'll thump you. Even after years of tolerating your insufferable existence, do you still believe that I could doubt you because of something as stupid as your lycanthropy?" Sirius shook his head. "No, you idiot, it wasn't because you're a werewolf. You had been disappearing for days at end and even missed a few Order meetings. And we knew there was a spy in the Order… now that I think about it, you can't blame me for getting suspicious." The silver eyes narrowed. "Which reminds me, I never got round to ask: where had you been going off to?"

"Voldemort's underground lair. There were rats there too."

"You're not being funny here."

Remus winced as his bones protested with pain when he sat forward. He glanced beseechingly at the sky; it seemed the full moon would never appear. He was getting crankier with the passing second and the sudden silence down in the square indicated that the other werewolves were too. "My brother," he said slowly, refusing to look at his friend. "My brother ran away from home and I was trying to track him down. Unfortunately, he's just like you when it comes to pigheadedness, so it was impossible to find him."

Sirius looked skeptical and sympathetic at the same time. Remus wanted to laugh at that; it was no secret that Sirius had hated Romulus Lupin to the core. "Well," he said gruffly. "I would have wished that you found him-for your sake."

The silence that followed was broken by a long mournful howl that sounded alarmingly human. Both men glanced up from their perch to the sky and Remus felt his blood electrifying as it responded to the call of the full moon. It was finally time.

He shared a glance with Sirius before leaping from the branch on to the ground. The thud that sounded behind him told him that his friend had jumped down as well. He turned to face the sky, where the full moon was a white lining behind the clouds, getting clearer and brighter as it slowly moved into view.

There was a clatter of wild footsteps hurrying toward the forest which indicated that the werewolves were moving in to transform. Remus, feeling the first jolt of pain of the transformation, turned to Sirius to warn him to turn back in to a dog, but his signal was lost in the abrupt pain that pierced through his shoulder, travelling to the base of his throat. Letting out a canine wince, he raised his head to look at his friend's face but his transforming eyes stared right over Sirius's shoulder.

Yellow eyes. Staring right at him. And at Sirius.

**Chapter 6: feral tussle**

Pain ricocheted through his body as his bones bent and turned, as fur began to sprout out of every limb. In the distance, the pained howls of his fellow lycanthropes tore through the night air. But the eyes were still there, staring, leering, bracing.

His body slammed against Sirius's at the same instant a gigantic form exploded from the trees, a human body morphing into a beast's and crashing to the ground on the place where Sirius had been standing only a moment ago.

His bones had already morphed: he couldn't stand straight. Spinning around with a guttural snarl, he charged at the still transforming feral, who, distracted from his earlier assault gone awry, didn't meet his attack head on. The two morphing werewolves crashed into the brush, jaws snapping and fangs bared. From the corner of his sharpening eyes, Remus saw that Sirius had already turned into a dog but the charm had worn off: Padfoot's fur was stark black.

Remus couldn't care less at that moment. "_Run_!" he roared at Sirius, before springing out of the feral's reach. He landed on four paws, affirming that he had transformed completely. Looking ahead, he saw a full-fledged gigantic wolf wrestle its way from the thorns, spitting in anger, yellow eyes never leaving his face.

It wasn't Greyback, he realized. It was a great tawny-furred female, one he had never met before. But, considering she was a feral, he had no doubt she had been taking orders from Voldemort on Greyback's account. But his mind still refused to understand why she had been spying from the background rather than walk right in to the square like every other werewolf there.

_Did she know that I was here? Does she know I've been coming here on Dumbledore's orders? _

These thoughts raged through his mind in the next second before the feral advanced on him with evil intent. She cocked her great head in confusion, probably wondering why he wasn't running loose to find prey. But any further curiosity lost to the cause of wolfsbane and its miraculous effects was gone in the next second, before she flung herself at him with a roar of fury.

A sharp claw narrowly missed his snout as he backed off. She maybe a female, but she _was_ a feral, which simply meant he wasn't much of a match for her. She charged at him with claws drawn back and he dashed forward at just the right moment, tackling her to the ground and bearing his fangs for her throat.

A sharp pain tore down his left arm as her claws sliced through his shoulder. Staggering back from the sudden burst of pain, he didn't have much time to prepare himself when she leapt up with astounding speed and bounded at him.

The expected collision never came; Remus blinked in surprise as a big black form collided with the feral in mid-air, hurtling her across the clearing with such force that the resulting crash echoed through the trees.

_That reckless idiot! I told him to get out of here._

He stood up angrily, licking the wound on his shoulder but never moving his gaze from the ferocious battle taking place. The snapping of jaws and claws meeting flesh could be heard repeatedly from the tussle. Dread mounting, Remus sped forward to them. If it had been an ordinary werewolf, he wouldn't have been worried, but Sirius fighting against a feral who was directly linked to Greyback…

He halted in his tracks when a howl ripped through the air. The two battling canines stopped abruptly in alarm as the thudding of paws resonated from the forest floor. The werewolves were dispersing within the forest. Back arching in determination, Remus leapt at the distracted feral and shoved her away from the dog the instant around a two dozen big furry bodies came snarling through the trees, thrashing in mindless fury and hunger in the brush as they ran.

Remus growled at Sirius, who, getting the signal ran for the opposite direction. With a last precautionary glance at the female lycanthrope, they both mingled in with the stampede, weaving their way deeper in to the forest. The confused feral howled in fury at her escaped targets, tossing her head wildly to catch sight of them amongst the other werewolves.

Overhead, the full moon glared down at the forest, and the werewolves, through their bloodthirsty charge for freedom, never noticed the advancing black -robed figures infiltrating the stony calm of Halvah Square.

**Chapter 7: Full moon frenzy**

It had been a trap. For _him_.

Throaty snarls issuing from his throat, Remus bounded powerfully behind Sirius, making sure he had the dog's flank covered.

He had been careless, and very irresponsible, putting Sirius directly in to Greyback's range.

He glanced sideways briefly, taking in the other werewolves which kept veering off in different directions at every turn. The feral was nowhere to be seen, her scent having disappeared completely. He growled at Sirius, signaling him to take a left.

They broke away from the main body of the stampede and dispersed among the trees into isolation from the rest of the howling forest. Still pulsing with adrenaline from their frantic course of escape, they didn't stop until they felt water beneath their paws and Sirius let out a low whine of pain. Remus halted abruptly, turning his great head towards his friend, while his skidding paws sent water splashing.

Sirius was bleeding, right from the shoulder where the feral beast had taken a chunk out of it. He sat back on his haunches in the shallow water, licking his wound fruitlessly. The werewolf let out a low hiss and moved toward his friend's side, nuzzling the wound with his much thicker fur. The dog relaxed considerably and leaned against the much larger canine. The atmosphere gave way to sudden, almost ominous silence.

"Funny," Remus started in alarm at the low remark, and hissed at Sirius, who now leaned back against the bank of the tiny stream, grinning wearily at him. "Our positions seem reversed this time around."

_Of course, they're reversed._ Before the invention of wolfsbane, back in their glory days of Hogwarts, it had been the werewolf being soothed by the dog, not the other way round. But, Remus figured, as he continued heeding to Sirius's injury, it was a nice change.

Sirius tangled his fingers through the werewolf's fur in a small bout of affection. "You're much bigger than before, Moony. You're telling me seventeen-year-old was just a wolfling?"

Remus just cocked his head; he dared not open his mouth, in case he accidently bit his friend. Wolfsbane or no wolfsbane, he was still a monster at the moment. Sirius's fingers trailed down his neck in a steady rhythm for the next minute. There was a strange tension in the air, coupled with the involuntary silence. A low howl ascending from a far-off distance froze Sirius's movements and he fixed Remus with wide silver eyes. "Remus, that was a feral back there, wasn't it?"

The werewolf jerked back abruptly, gold eyes smoldering with slipping panic. Sirius ran a hand gingerly over his clotting wound and turned his head toward the sky. "We're in a bigger fix than I thought…" he muttered.

Remus followed his gaze and couldn't quell the intense guilt and dread that rose in him in that instant. The greenish glow in the sky gave little doubt of what had happened, despite how well the trees tried to obscure it. He could clearly imagine the dark mark floating in the starless sky right above Halvah square.

And that was it: the short, safe silence that had held the few previous moments shattered as the werewolf jumped to his feet, disrupting the steady drum of the water with his great body.

_I have to get him out of here._

He growled softly, padding along the water in an infuriated pace. _But how?_

The only way out of there that he knew of was Halvah Square's fireplace, which had been infiltrated with Death Eaters the moment the werewolves charged into the forest, if the dark mark was any indication.


End file.
